After the bath, just before bedtime.
As usual, I’m spending time with Kyle in the bedroom.
But today, Kyle was unusually quiet.
He didn’t talk much at dinner with Chris and me either.
I wonder if it was better not to have met with Klaus.
I was able to learn more about Ahrens’ situation that had been on my mind.
However, after hearing from Chris, who was present, I learned that Klaus had apologized to Kyle.
Apologizing now, when it’s too late to take back,
I can understand Klaus’ feelings of wanting to apologize.
But, being continually apologized to by someone who has no intention of forgiving. . .
I wonder if it was just painful for Kyle.
I sit so that I’m embraced from behind on the sofa in the bedroom.
Kyle wraps his arms around me, and leans his forehead on my shoulder.
I heard a small sigh near my ear.
“Are you okay? Tired?”
“. . .No, not tired exactly.
I thought I was over it, but I find myself thinking about it.”
“About Prince Klaus? Or about Ahrens?”
“Yeah, that’s right. Maybe both.
I don’t have any memories of my mother.
I was separated from her right after I was born, and only a wet nurse was with me until the end.
It seems the wet nurse followed her when she got married to the main household, but,
When my mother died, she was sent back to the branch family, and I’ve never even met her.
I wonder what Klaus thought about our mother dying in that situation. . .”
“It’s hard to recognize what you’ve done, your own sin.
The heavier the sin, the more you don’t want to admit it.
The people of Ahrens were cold to Kyle,
Probably taking it out on Kyle because they didn’t want to admit it.”
“Not wanting to admit their guilt?”
“Yeah. Even if they regretted they were wrong,
Your mother is already gone, right?
Even if they wanted to atone, it’s too late.
And yet, the sin is too heavy to bear.
So, by being cold to Kyle,
They probably wanted to think that they weren’t wrong after all.”
“I do feel that way, now that you say it.
They could have just ignored me and never met me,
But they went out of their way to throw stones at me.
If they really hated me, they wouldn’t have come to see me.
Klaus looked, I don’t know, cornered.
Maybe he’s been slightly aware of it since then.”
Throwing stones at Kyle. . .
Even if he wanted to escape from the guilt, he had no right to hurt his younger brother.
Listening to Kyle speak calmly, my heart feels constricted.
“Still, the ones who suffered were Kyle and his mother.
. . .You don’t have to try to understand it.”
“Maybe, Prince Klaus wanted Kyle to scold him?”
“Apologizing wouldn’t make a difference, but he felt like he had to do something,
They must have been driven to that point, right?
So maybe he thought it would be better to be blamed by Kyle.”
“. . .That might be the case, but I didn’t want to say anything.
Even if I said something, nothing would change.
Blaming Klaus now is pointless.
The time when I wanted to be saved has long passed.”
“Kyle wanted to be saved?”
When was that? Was it when he was in Ahrens?
He said he had no place there.
I met him after that; I couldn’t do anything for him then. . .It’s frustrating.
“I realized I wanted to be saved, for the first time.
I wanted to be needed by someone.
I wanted someone to take my hand and tell me I was important.”
Suddenly lifted and turned around, I sat down again.
Sitting on Kyle’s lap, we face each other.
I want something to hold, so I grab the front of Kyle’s shirt with both hands.
Looking up, our foreheads touch, and Kyle whispers.
Sofia needed me.
You said you wouldn’t be lonely if I was by your side.
You asked me to stay with you forever.”
“I saved Kyle?”
Certainly, I was the one who asked Kyle.
When I first saw Kyle’s face and he greeted me, I knew it was him.
He was the one who responded to me.
My memories from my previous life had just returned, and my consciousness as Sofia was still faint.
So, when I woke up, I was afraid that I would still be alone in that tower,
Feeling lonely and scared, searching for someone’s presence.
The room in the western palace, with only the bare minimum of furniture, resembled the tower’s room.
My malnourished body felt as heavy and sluggish as the old witch’s body after being drained of magic.
The time from waking up until remembering that I was Sofia was the scariest.
That’s when Kyle, my observer, responded with a knock.
There was someone there. Someone who would react to my words.
I wasn’t in that tower anymore. Someone was with me, protecting me.
I can’t express how reassuring that was.
So, I wanted him to be with me forever.
Kyle, who was there when I most wanted someone by my side.
If he felt like he had no place, I wanted to create a place for him.
Did that save Kyle?