Chapter 76: I couldn’t breathe without blaming someone else
It’s my fault that he died. After completing my two-year study abroad program in Timberth, I wrote down the date I was going to return and sent it to him in a letter.
Mian, who had been spending time at the estate within the territory with his father, hurried to the capital when he found out about my return. The letter I sent from Timberth arrived to him later than I expected. On his way, he was attacked and killed by a group of former knights turned bandits.
——I wanted to see you first when I returned.
He wanted to keep that promise.
“If only I hadn’t said those things…”
It was my fault that he had fewer bodyguards than usual during his carriage ride.
It was my fault that he took a different route to the capital than usual.
It was my fault that his body was torn apart by swords.
It was my fault, my fault…
“Is it really my fault…?”
Come to think of it, if His Highness Julian hadn’t gone to study abroad in Timberth, I would’ve never left the country. No, if we were to trace it back, if Lady Quatra hadn’t caused such a problem, I wouldn’t have needed to use my power to turn back time at all.
“Mian… I should have just married without love instead of losing you…”
A lost life cannot be returned. Force cannot be used for my own greed. Just like back then, I’m sure I cannot turn back time again. My desire to revive Mian is too strong.
“Mian, Mian, my precious Mian…”
On the cemetery hill outside of the royal capital, I wonder how long I clung to his grave. The sky that was shining brightly with the sun had turned overcast and started to rain heavily.
Forcibly pulled away by the guards, I struggled and screamed, and lost consciousness along the way. When I awoke, I was in my room, lying in my soft and fragrant bed with smooth sheets.
Thinking of him buried in the damp, hard soil, I shed tears once again.
Is it really my fault?
Wasn’t it that woman who took Mian away from me?
Lady Quatra was so jealous that she wanted to kill me. Such a cruel and selfish personality cannot easily change.
Perhaps that woman still resents me. Despite leaving behind memories in hopes of repenting and not repeating the same mistake, she may have taken revenge on me for it.
If she was somewhere praying to god for my misfortune even now…
“That’s right. Mian’s death was all Aliseteen Quatra’s fault.”
I tried to help you.
I will never forgive you for taking him from me.
Blood trickled down from my bitten lips and dripped onto the pure white sheets.
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