Chapter 48: Guilt
Once I had made up my mind, I immediately tried to take action. However, there was someone I needed to get permission from first. The next day, I called Julian-sama and met him at the gazebo in the garden.
“It’s rare for Alise to talk to me.”
He said with what seemed like a happy expression. Seeing him like this, I couldn’t help but wonder where that emotionless iron mask of his had gone.
“I’d like to ask for your permission today.”
“I want to interact with a certain man for a while.”
As soon as I said that, all emotions disappeared from Julian-sama’s face.
Yes, that’s right. When it comes to Julian-sama, this is typical.
It felt strangely nostalgic.
I told him everything that happened yesterday, but he still had a stern expression. I had talked to him beforehand so as not to repeat what happened with Tanatora-san, but it seems that he still wasn’t pleased.
Currently, Julian-sama doesn’t seem to dislike me. Rather, I don’t think it’s conceited to say that he likes me more than the other young ladies.
He smiles at me genuinely, just like Aliseteen had always wanted before.
However, every time he does so, something in the depths of my heart stirs restlessly.
“Was Alise always such a pushover?”
“It’s not for his sake, but for mine. It just feels wrong to let things end like this.”
“You should just forget about a guy like that.”
Murmuring something under his breath, Julian-sama approaches me. He grabs a strand of my amber hair and gives me a kiss, as if to show off.
“Don’t forget, you belong to me.”
“If you can promise me that, I’ll forgive you.”
As I tremble before his gray eyes, I can’t even understand why. To hide my shame, I just nod silently. Julian’s lips curl up in satisfaction.
“I’ll allow you to associate with that man, but of course, I’ll be there too.”
“I apologize. It was my own fault.”
“Just the thought of you being with someone other than me… it’s driving me crazy.”
Julian-sama’s expressionless face can be more terrifying than anything else. He has a ruthless judgmental trait that he can make without showing any expression, so it’s scary to go against him any further.
“I understand. It is unforgivable for me to cause trouble for Julian-sama, but you’re right.”
I myself didn’t really care if we left things as they were. But somehow, Owen-san, who lamented that he couldn’t change anything, seemed to overlap with me.
Although he failed, he took action on his own. He is fundamentally different from me, who was lucky to be able to turn time back just because I died.
I understand that, but…
“Why do you look so sad, what’s wrong Alise?”
“No, it’s nothing.”
I turned my gaze away, indicating that the conversation was over, and headed back to the classroom.
“Alise, someday you’ll… well, forget it.”
I didn’t pursue his unfinished words.