𝐂𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐡’𝐬 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝟏
For me, being naturally intelligent was a stroke of good luck.
My misfortune was being born into royalty.
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Raised on praise as the heir, my intelligence soon made me aware of my parents’ twistedness.
Our family, unlike what one might typically imagine, or even an aristocratic household, was fundamentally different – a royal one by name, but decisively peculiar at the core.
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While my father was earnestly advancing reforms to strengthen the country, his disturbing obsession with my mother was evident.
My mother, adept at managing the nobles and maintaining the power balance, was secretly called a witch. Had the country fallen into ruin, she might have been labeled a femme fatale, but instead, she was actually serving the nation’s interests.
Smiling at being obsessively adored by two difficult characters, my mother considered it love.
My father, needing to see her at least every few hours or else he seemed on the brink of madness, knew every action of hers.
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As I grew older, the grim reality of my silent guardians and servants became clear, and I was massively sickened.
The revulsion was unbearable.
Realizing once again that this couple stood at the nation’s pinnacle was a moment of utter despair.
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“Coleesh means sun. It’s a name given to illuminate this country.”
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When did this conversation with my mother, smiling like an innocent girl, take place?
The personal interactions with my parents, or rather my mother, are so few that I remember them vividly.
After all, soon after, my father arrived and took her away. His glare was not one that should be directed at a son.
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A father jealous even of his son suggests a mind quite different from the ordinary.
And my mother, willingly following him, honestly, I have my doubts.
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Therefore, feeling that leaving the country in their hands would eventually lead to irreparable damage, I studied desperately.
As I learned, I gradually began to be entrusted with simple tasks, and the number of people following me grew considerably.
Indeed, many shared my concerns about those parents. Yes.
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Even my father’s close aides were eager to get me involved in work.
My father, aware of this, said nothing. I heard from the aides that he was happy to have more time with my mother.
Rather, under the pretext of nurturing his son, he began to delegate work to me. The extent to which my mother was the focus, it made me somewhat nauseated.
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In a normal family, running away or sneaking off might offer escape.
Unfortunately, as a royal and currently an only child, my ascension to the throne is nearly certain.
Considering my father, he would never take a concubine, and even if he did, he likely wouldn’t approach her.
This is the same father who can’t bear the thought of sharing my mother or that she might spend time thinking about a child. Another child is out of the question.
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Yet, when I was 15, a brother was born.
Given my mother’s age, it was unlikely this couple would have another child.
I saw the child named Linus only after more than a month since his birth.
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I will never forget the thrill when his tiny, fragile fingers tightly gripped mine.
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For Linus and for the nation, I must not become an ordinary royal!
Since resolving this, I’ve worked even harder. The only solace is the time spent with Linus.
Since Linus’s birth, I’ve stopped feeling nauseous, and I’m truly glad he was born.
Though, as a result, my aides have become wary of Linus.
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I’m haunted by the fear that I might become like my father, and it leaves me feeling incredibly conflicted.
Certainly, having Linus around is why I can keep going, but I would never do things the way my father did.
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With the conviction that Linus is my only family, and the desire to improve the country Linus lives in, my greatest turning point came sooner than I thought.
My mother was poisoned.
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There was no time to grieve.
Because my father had abandoned all his work.
Those who admired my mother were too quirky but capable and held important positions. When they all simultaneously quit their jobs, the castle was thrown into chaos.
While giving those orders and preparing for the state funeral, my father said he would abdicate the throne to me, leading to further turmoil.
In the end, the conclusion was that I couldn’t leave it to a father who could only weep or rage in helplessness, so it was decided that I would become king. At the same time, it was decided that I would marry my fiancée a year later.
It’s not good for a king to be unmarried. That’s why I have little memory of the years following my mother’s death. I was too desperate, and I hardly slept.
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That’s why I failed to notice Dyson’s true nature.
Even at my mother’s funeral, he was just a parent mourning the premature death of his daughter. He showed no suspicious behavior. Despite the bad rumors, my mother denied them, and they appeared to be a close-knit family.
Dyson was Linus’s patron, so it was natural for him to surround Linus with his own faction.
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But making excuses doesn’t change anything.
While I said I cared for Linus, I was too caught up in the affairs of the state. I didn’t realize Linus’s situation until he pointed it out himself.