𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓𝟕: 𝐄𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
Irma was a year older than Rachael but had been frail since childhood and ate very little. As a result, it was said they were identical in physique and height, like twins.
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“We used to play a lot when we were little, and we were good friends. There was even a time when I thought of her as my best friend. But――”
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Rachael’s expression darkened. There must have been something between her and Irma.
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“Even though Irma was physically weak, she was full of energy and always wanted to play outside.”
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This was a story from more than ten years ago—―when Irma was seven and Rachael was six.
It was a memory that was so vivid it seemed she could remember it clearly even now.
It seemed that Irma was forbidden by her nanny to go out in the wind as she would immediately develop a fever.
However, when Rachael arrived, the nanny’s watchful eyes would become lax.
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“So, when she invited me to go outside and play, we went for a walk in the garden.”
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It seemed that Irma and Rachael had a great time playing, but a few hours later, an unexpected situation occurred.
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“It was a bit of a chilly day. It wouldn’t have been a problem for a healthy child, but Irma was different because she was frail.”
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She developed a fever and had to lie down.
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“Irma’s Okaa-sama and grandmother scolded me a lot. They said it was my fault for taking her out.”
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Back then, Rachael wasn’t allowed to talk back.
She couldn’t say that she had been invited by Irma to go out into the garden.
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“I was very frustrated, but I thought I would just have to be more careful next time.”
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However, similar incidents kept happening.
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“Breaking expensive tea cups, soiling dresses, inviting stray cats into the mansion—―all of these things were done by Irma, but in the end, I was the one who got blamed.”
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No matter how much Irma claimed to have done it herself, she was only recognized as a kind child who defended Rachael.
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“It was so contrasting. Irma could do whatever she wanted, and I was seen in a bad light even though I hadn’t done anything.”
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One of the reasons was probably that they always played at the Marquis’ house, where Rachael had no allies.
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“Irma was loved by many people and was raised like a princess. The difference in treatment between her and me, who was raised strictly as the daughter of the Grand Duke, was as vast as heaven and earth.”
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Rachael’s family held a higher social status.
In theory, the people of the Marquis’ house should have treated Rachael, the daughter of the Grand Duke, with the utmost respect.
The fact that they didn’t do so was probably because everyone blindly loved Irma.
As a noblewoman, Rachael, who had been strictly educated, was in fact more appropriate.
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“Gradually, my feelings towards Irma became horribly distorted.”
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She couldn’t even host a tea party properly and kept asking Rachael to accompany her.
And yet, there were many people around Irma, and smiles were everywhere.
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“I started to hate her, ignoring my own faults.”
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Irma had always relied on Rachael, but one day, she stopped doing so.
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“When I heard that she had attended a nighttime event alone and collapsed, I felt somewhat relieved.”
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Rachael had always been by her side, allowing her to rest and refusing dance invitations on her behalf.
However, Irma, who had attended alone, seemed to have danced until she exhausted herself, not knowing her limits.
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“But that day, it seems Lord Montyver helped Irma.”
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Even without Rachael, Irma would always get help from somewhere.
No matter what the situation, she never truly seemed to be in trouble.
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“I thought she was like the protagonist of a convenient romance story.”
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Even if she was oppressed by someone, or fell ill, a prince would appear gallantly and reach out his hand to her.
For Rachael, who had been supporting Irma for many years, this scene was a shocking sight.
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“There are many people who will help her even if I’m not around, and her wishes come true naturally. There were days when I thought the world existed for Irma.”
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It seemed that Irma, having failed to ask the name of Lord Montyver who had helped her at the party, was spending her days in turmoil.
In the midst of this situation, she had a fateful encounter with him who had come to drink the tea of the Marquis family.
Irma, whose mind was full of Lord Montyver, seemed to have realized that she was in love with him.
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“Even though she was supposed to be educated to marry into royalty, Irma and Lord Montyver’s engagement was quickly accepted. It’s unprecedented for a noblewoman to choose her own marriage partner. When I heard that, I decided to cut ties with her. It’s unbelievable. I can’t associate with someone who would waste all the time and money that we’ve spent on her in an instant.”
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Their engagement was provisional. Rachael seemed to be unaware of this.
If she had known, her feelings for Irma might have changed.
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“I was jealous of Irma, who had everything: the man she loved, friends and acquaintances, a happy environment. Even though I had decided to cut ties, I was always thinking about her.”
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Rachael, who was unable to decide on a fiancé, witnessed a scene at the Marquis house.
It was the sight of Irma, walking arm in arm with Lord Montyver, looking happy.
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“The moment I saw that, I found myself wishing that she would disappear from this world.”
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Curiously, that very night, Irma disappeared.
The last Irma that Rachael saw was on the day she confessed to Lord Montyver.
Even though they were not happy at all, they must have seemed to be deepening their love smoothly as engaged couples from the outside.
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The news of Irma’s disappearance had reached Rachael’s ears.
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“I thought she had secretly gone to Lord Montyver’s. I was underestimating the situation.”
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The next day, her body was found.
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“I prayed for Irma’s death, and she really died! It was my foolish fault!”
“That’s not true!”
“It’s undeniable! I, I killed Irma!”
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Rachael holds her head and pleads in a voice almost like a scream.
Her face was pale and her forehead was covered in sweat.
I held her and whispered in her ear that it wasn’t so.
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“You are not to blame. Please, don’t blame yourself.”
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When she had regained her composure, Rachael began to talk about what happened after Irma’s death.
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“I took over the charity work that Irma was doing, as if to atone for my sins.”
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Despite the advice of those around her, Rachael seemed to be devoted to charity work.
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“There were many children in the orphanage who loved Irma, and they were saddened when I told them that she couldn’t come anymore. No matter how much charity work I did in the same way, I couldn’t replace her.”
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However, Rachael was accepted by the children quickly.
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“It seems that Irma had told the children about me. ‘She’s very kind, and although she’s younger, she’s like a big sister, the most wonderful woman in the world’………. When I heard that, I started crying out loud in front of the children.”
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It was after her death that Rachael learned how much Irma loved her.
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“I was incredibly jealous, humble, and without making any effort to be loved, I was always jealous of Irma. There was a part of me that lived arrogantly because I was the daughter of the Grand Duke. Even though there was no way I could be loved like Irma, I didn’t realize it.”
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Even if she wanted to apologize, Irma was no longer in this world.
Even if she spoke to her at her grave, no words would come back.
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“When I was doing charity work without looking around, I was called ‘The Saint of Binemöer’ before I knew it. It’s ironic that I should take away something that Irma should have originally received.”
“No, I don’t think so. There is a fact that you were so devoted to charity work that you were called by the nickname ‘Saint’.”
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Rachael moistened her eyes. When she blinked, tears spilled out.
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“Lara-san, thank you.”
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I never imagined that there would be such a reason for the Binemöer’s Saintess.
It seems that Rachael had also been imprisoned by Irma’s death for many years.
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“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to talk about this.”
“No.”
“I’ve said a lot, but you don’t have to worry about Irma. Lara-san, you’re a wonderful woman, so Lord Montyver should open his heart to you.”
“Thank you.”
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Having regained her composure, Rachael revealed the reason she led me to the Marquis’ house.
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“The reason I brought Lara-san here was also like an atonement. Despite being so weak that it’s unbearable to watch since Irma’s death, grandmother doesn’t want to rely on anyone else’s strength. I thought if it were Lara-san, who doesn’t know about Irma, she might rely on us. That was my plan.”
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Rachael holds my hand and expresses her gratitude.
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“Thank you for always supporting grandmother. Lara-san, you’re the true Saintess for us.”
“Saintess, that’s too grand a word for me.”
“Don’t be modest.”
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From then on, Rachael let me listen to her talk about Irma, bit by bit.
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“Irma was a really competent girl, and she was even selected to be the maid of the queen consort, a position I was supposed to be.”
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Apparently, there is a tradition of serving as a maid to the queen for a week as part of a bride’s training in a good family.
The duration is about a week, so it’s not that long.
Originally, Rachael was the one to go, but it was decided that Irma would go because she didn’t have a fiancé.
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“The decision came at the last minute, I was so frustrated, even though I had already prepared!”
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Irma took the bridal training tools prepared by Rachael and went to the royal palace.
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“I was really angry, but my bridal training was decided on soon after.”
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It seems that she had been told several times by Irma that she wanted to see her before going to the queen, but she had been refusing.
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“The day before going to the palace, a letter arrived. There was a certain warning written in it.”
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It was a warning not to go to the gazebo to the west of the garden at midnight.
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“They say the ghosts of a man and woman appear. It was a creepy story.”
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Of course, the serious Rachael didn’t go to check on the ghosts and served as the queen’s maid excellently for a week.
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